Nightmares are the true parody of rational thinking,.  Waking from a slumber ,  with your skin glistening in the moonlight may sound romantic or even sensual, though in this case the truth is far from any mills and boon.  
Your eyes do not flutter open like the book’s describe,  moreover you are sat bolt upright eyes open trying usually to get away from the now unseen horror.  The glistening skin is a cold shimmer  of fear perspired at a moment of sheer terror.  It has to be said,  I am no fan of nightmares.  
They got so bad in my pat,  that I simply refused to sleep.  At first they woke me screaming fighting to get away,  from the event that caused them, then they started to paralyze my body.  These nightmares where do strong they would imprison my now lucid conscious mind in a body that refused to move.  
What started out as frightened damp awakening,  turned into heart rending terror.   And soon I was too afraid to sleep.  I tried the medical route after a few nights of the paralyzed fear.  She said ” medication and relaxation therapy would help. ” Soothing sounds and a advil? It did nothing.  
Instead of helping me,  it gave my body an excuse to navigate around the problem.  If you refuse to sleep long enough your body either pops itself to shut down,  or as in my case you find your mind refuses to switch off and this means you rarely sleep.  You learn to change your life yo fit your needs.  So in my case,  I slept every third day.  My body worked the rules out.  
Extreme exhaustion eventually takes its toll and you simply shut down for a period of time.  I was fortunate for many years to live isolated from the world around me.  So no one knew what was really going on,  and I learned to mentality cope and trained my mind to simply not dream because they always turned into the same twisted versions of the same nightmare.  
During the event that changed my life irreparably,  which controlled my existence for so many years. I was too afraid to stop what was being done to me.  At nineteen you really don’t have much choice but to try and exist with the frame work of the situation or give in to the last step in the process.  Usually that is suicide.  
My choices,  those I was allowed to have,  haunt my day to day life in ways I would still have problems with had I not found second life and after kissing many frogs I found my balance in a most unusual environment.  
I became a Brightflame.  My prince,  turned out to be a pair of princesses.  One a vampire,  normal height cute bum,  athletic body,  with a voice to die for! The other was a crazy assed oversized 10ft giant with huge breasts,  a cut bum,  and most perfect freckled face.  
 Balance is the key.  With balance you can weigh odds and averages until you find either the tipping point or you find the counter point.  In the same way you force a child to understand the dangers of fire or drowning.  You find the reasoning and force a balance to occur that is acceptable to the child.  So too the silver younger devil provided me with a tipping point and the giant gave me the counter point.  
The tipping point was remarkably simple in its truth.  She in her usual casual style,  told me to face it by writing it out in a letter to myself explaining what I had done to me.  In short to face the mirror.  
The giantess used the counter point I provided her my submission to her, She flipped that self same counter point and with care and wisdom, She provided the same balance of mind and body to me through the avenue of the lifestyle I have lived for so long.  Bdsm.  Though in this case it was more bDsm.   
Over the next two years,  She has balanced my soil and mind,  given me pause for thought.  And most recently given me the strength to be me.  The only way to repay such a gift,  is with my total obedience and loyalty.  So far I have given up drinking,  smoking,  and my fear of rejection. I have also had fewer nightmares,  and now after much counselling inI am able to sleep.  
I still have nightmares,  they appear  when I am over thinking the past.  Then when I admit it,  She calls me over,  wraps Her arms or chest around me,  forced me to  watch a sunset and returns me the gift of balance. 
Can it truly be so blessed to have finally found a Woman I can say ” I love you ” too? No.  Two women.  Yes.  

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